10 FOODS I’VE TRIED & VOW TO NEVER EAT AGAIN

I realize this is a bit off the wall, but my regularly scheduled post just isn’t coming together, so you get to read some randomness. Normally I share recipes and details about foods I adore- ones I love and just can’t get enough of. Just know this isn’t one of those posts.

Each and every person on the planet has their own little food idiosyncrasies. It’s part of what makes us unique. I love hearing about what people enjoy eating! Today’s post is a spin off of the ‘What’s your Favorite Food” question. I’d like to share with you all 10 Foods I’ve Tried… and Vow to NEVER Eat Again.

In no particular order… {save the last one, it’s last for a reason…}

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1. Okra
Don’t let the pretty little green vegetable fool you- inside is nothing but pure, oozing slime. I’m sure it’s super healthy and could add 10 years to my life, but I just can’t do it.

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2. Calamari
I tried to find the least offensive picture known to man because all the others were creepy. Why were they creepy, you ask? Well, because if you’re not aware, calamari is squid, tentacles and all. Tentacles. Right there on your fancy little plate, for you to eat. Never again.

3. Cheese in a Can
In my defense, I ate this while pregnant, so I blame it on the fact that I was hormonal. Cheese should not ooze from a can. Ever. I don’t care what foul flavor they attempt to enhance whatever is in there with- it’s not food, I’m sure of it.

4. Eggs Over Easy
Ok, so I know this list is supposed to be foods I’ve tried and didn’t like. Here’s a confession- I regularly cook these for my husband. He says I make them perfectly!  But I’ve never eaten one myself. I won’t, so don’t even attempt to talk me into it! I already have issues with under-cooked chicken, when you purposefully do not cook the egg all the way, it’s just wrong. Each time I make these I can practically hear the egg telling me, “I wanted to be scrambled, an omelet- ANYTHING other than this sunny-side-up nastiness.” Next time I’ll listen…

5. Brussel Sprouts
I love, love vegetables. Really, most types I have no problem with whatsoever. Now two, I have issues with. See #1 above. The other are these little bad boys. They look so harmless, so cute- like tiny little cabbages. I like cabbage. But brussel sprouts? They are just gross. I’ve tried so many times to like them and each time I’m reminded of just how quickly my gag reflexes work. Nope, never again.

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6. Southern Style Grits
I have problems when breakfast food swims in bacon grease. I like bacon, don’t get me wrong, but please do not save the grease and pour it over another food like a sauce. I tried to eat Southern Style Grits, but I could practically feel my arteries hardening on contact. These look so pretty, but that’s a no on the bacon-flavored mush for me…

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7. Green Smoothies with Lettuce
Green Smoothies are the latest trend in health food. I admit it- I jumped on board. Get this- I even grew the lettuce myself. Move over Pioneer Woman. I was whipping up these smoothies thinking, “I’ll drink this and not get sick for a year, I’ll have enough energy to run a marathon and won’t have to wear make-up anymore because my skin will just glow.” Instead I chugged some and ran to the sink to spit it out. ICK. Use spinach instead because lettuce does not belong in a smoothie, unless you’re opting to drink something that can be described as “Mother Earth in a Glass.” I washed all the dirt off, I assure you. Worst part? The aftertaste lasted for days… I still have nightmares about it.

8. Spam
Well lookie here, another “food” item that comes in a can. Seeing a trend? Spam. My dad loves it. To me, it’s just a salty, disgusting ham wannabe. Anyone remember that song by Save Ferris? She says Spam is made in Chernobyl and you know what? I believe her. 

9. Circus Peanut Candy
Ok, maybe you can all clear up my confusion. What is this? Is it nougat?  A really bad attempt at a marshmallow? What’s with the orange flavor? I don’t get it. All I know it’s NOT candy. Orange colored packing peanuts, now that’s more like it. Do not eat this, instead use it to pad your valuables when moving day comes.

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10. Beef Tongue
See, I saved the best for last, didn’t I? You know, I can’t remember the circumstances surrounding when I chose to eat cow tongue. I like to think it was when I was kidnapped and held hostage by angry gourmet chefs somewhere overseas. {Because yeah, that happened…} For anyone who is wondering, yes, cow tongue has the same texture that your tongue has. Really. It’s like a french kiss gone very, very wrong. I couldn’t do it. Thank heavens for napkins because that’s exactly where that bite ended up. Ugh.

There you have it! What are some foods on YOUR list? Share, because I did…probably a little too much, wouldn’t you say?

Here’s a little disclaimer too: This is just my opinion. If you regularly eat southern style grits with a side of easy over eggs, topped with Okra and cheese whiz- more power to you! I, on the other hand, will not. As a matter of fact, I’d rather eat grass or tree bark or something. Even so- don’t let me stop you! 

Have a great weekend everyone…

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Comments

  1. says

    Being from the South I almost gasped at the grits comment….but I honestly have never had them greased up before!! Now I know I can fully trust this blog, because the other stuff I totally agree with. Brussels sprouts….ughhh…..worst flavor EVER!

  2. says

    Liver…my parents fed it to me when I was little as the theory then was that it was good for you. I have vague awful memories and I have threatened my children with this :) but I will never eat it (or really make anyone else!). And steamed spinach, same story as above. Fresh in a salad is fabulous but steamed…ick!!!

  3. says

    I can actually stomach brussel sprouts. It's not like I crave them or anything, but roasted with olive oil and a few pieces of crumbled bacon and they aren't bad. I COMPLETELY agree with you on eggs over easy. BLEGGH! My husband loves them, I however think that food in general shouldn't ooze (especially if it was once or once could have had the potential to breathe). Just my humble

  4. Tara says

    Great post! But I gotta say I love me some easy cheese. Although I'll only eat the name brand because store brand seems too nasty. Go figure. A few things I'd put on my list are cabbage rolls, stuffed peppers, and spaghetti casserole.

  5. says

    Baccala – for those unfamiliar with it, it is salted cod – As I write this I cannot stop the contortions my face and neck muscles are making! I NEVER tasted it as the look of it, imagine a white dried piece of shoe leather glistening in salt, never allowed it! Then when my mother prepared it when I was a kid, the stench made me leave my home and play outside as long as I could! blech!

  6. Bev in Texas says

    Wow! Few things disgust me like okra. I cannot abide anything that's fuzzy on the outside and slimy on the inside. Canned cheese, Brussels sprouts, calamari, lettuce smoothies, beef tongue – no, no, no, no and no. I do, however, love circus peanuts if they're very, very fresh and soft; Lite Spam (it's low salt and low fat; much better than the original); grits (never had them with

  7. says

    Okra is awesome when dusted in flour and deep fried, circus peanuts however are disgusting some people say they taste like banana, I just think they are gross. Grits are great with butter or you can mix it with brown sugar and honey and they are tasty. My opinion on organ meats, heart, liver, brain, gizzards all gross dont come near me with that crap yuck. I agree with most of this list, however

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